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Zombie Training Day

November 19, 2012 - Experience
Zombie Training Day
What’s worse than regular zombies? That’s right: COCKNEY ZOMBIES! Shuffling up the apple and pears [stairs] trying to eat your Michael Caines [um, brains]. Vanquish them with this exhilarating zombie experience in London town’s fashionable North Greenwich district.

Can you imagine the horrors that await if the dead of London suddenly arose en masse? Dirty Den back in zombie form? The hulking gore-smeared mass of Dick Whittington and his zombie cat? It would make London even less liveable.

But this horrifying scenario has one hero who can vanquish the filthy undead cockney hordes. YOU! We need you to travel to a secret underground location in North Greenwich, where experimental things are done on dead chaps. We can’t tell you exactly where it is, but it’s in London so probably has a Starbucks within 50 feet of it.

At the bunker you’ll be briefed, trained and be given full instruction on how to tackle these pesky zombie types. You’ll then be provided with three types of weaponry to utilise against the hideous enemy. Then the Undead Response Unit (a military group combating zombies – not the metal band from Colchester) will show you techniques to destroy these re-animated rascals.

For 3.5 hours you’ll undertake missions under the watchful eye of your commanders. And you better listen to them – those things they are shouting at you could save your life. If you let your guard down even for a second, someone will be tucking into his brains like they’re a brainy Arctic Roll – and nobody wants that.

You’ll get hot, you’ll get scared, you’ll almost certainly wear a jumpsuit. But if you’ve always wanted to battle zombies just like that TV show you really like (Emmerdale) this is the experience for you. High on adrenaline, low on good skincare regimes – you will come face to face with the horrors of the living dead apocalypse and it will take all your cunning, guile and running about to defeat them and save mankind. Just use your brains. Your delicious, juicy, human brains and head to the smoke for this exhilarating, exciting one-of-a-king Zombie Battle Experience.

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